The Northman Review: Best Masculinity Fuel Of 2022

the northman

The Northman Plot

The Northman centers around Prince Amleth as he is forced from boyhood into a savage barbarian after witnessing the death of his father and kingdom. He flees, only to return as a barbarian to avenge his father, save his mother, and kill Fjolnir.


Amleth (Alexander Skarsgard) is a prince of a failing kingdom and son to King Aurvandil (Ethan Hawke) who returned home after being wounded in battle. The King takes Amleth to see Heimir the Fool (Willem Dafoe) and they perform a ritual acting like wolves. (Drugs may have been introduced) during the drug trip, the King made Amleth promise to avenge him. Literally the next day, while Amleth was tasting snow, his father was assassinated by his uncle Fjolnir. and he fled once he heard they were after his life also.

Some time has passed and he is a savage warrior grabbing a spear mid air and tossing it back, crushing mens skulls, and ripping a guys throat out with his teeth.

(Brutal) in this new life of his, he is reminded by a Seer about his oath to his father and is sent on a road of vengeance. Amleth changes his appearance slightly and brands himself as a slave to head to the new kingdom his cowardly uncle resides in, since he lost the old kingdom to King Harold of Norway. in his quest for vengeance, Amleth finds the love of Olga, the hellish draugr sword, learns the truth of what happened that day from his mother.

(She is for the streets) and everything comes full circle when Amleth wants to protect his new family and fulfills his oath to his father at the cost of his life deeming him worthy to enter Valhalla.


I would have picked a different actor besides Alexander Skarsgard since he got beat up by a CGI gorilla in Tarzan. He was the loser scientist guy in Godzilla vs Kong, the movie wants to portray him as this alpha-king of kings when he’s simply not that guy. Even though I have grips with the actor with a decent script he can pull it off.

The Northman Thoughts

This film is influenced by Scandinavian folklore, which is why it’s so different from Hollywood “blockbusters” today. The story is decent and has self-fulfilling prophecies instead of everyone living happily ever after.

This could be considered the 300 of 2022. It is very masculine, bloody, and sweaty. The story is very similar to The Lion King, but instead of Africa it takes place in the “old country”, where how tough you are is determined by how long your beard is. This movie is going to capitalize on the Viking trend we see in America now.

That’s a smart move by Robert Eggers. I see this film doing well by the visuals alone. Somehow, someway, this film will be broken down like Matt Reeves The Joker about the plight of the Caucasian American, in a society that cares nothing about you and still wants you to be a protector for the elites, etc.

The Northman movie scores 6 out of 10

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